“Well…I can’t speak for everyone Eds…But I’m just waiting for the day when you can look me in the eyes and tell me the Truth.” You leaned in a little, trying to catch the others gaze but instead you just met tears. “Why is everyone asking me if I’m okay?” Eddie said with a small huff as he pulled his knees to his chest, clearly upset by the fact that people were concerned about him. The boy looked at the ground and bit his lip before shakily sitting down, not too close so he didn’t touch you. “Come on Eddie…Sit next to me?” You tilted your head a little and smiled to hopefully convince him. You ended up sitting on the ground by a tree so you could lean on it, but Eddie just stood awkwardly for a moment. In your mind, you assumed that he needed some fresh air to help calm him down. “I’m not hungry anyway…but can we talk alone?” “I’m skipping lunch…But I need to talk to you, okay? Just for a little bit…” You watched as your best friend looked at you, then your hand, then back at you, before giving in. You could only frown before holding a hand out. “Hey…” His voice cracked and you watched as he winced from it. He visibly jumped and slowly turned around to face you, same sad smile plastered on his face. “Eddie?” You called for him as he left the classroom late due to him falling asleep on the desk. It destroyed your heart and after a month of this, you finally grew the courage to approach him. He was a straight A student, now barely able to keep Cs and Ds in all of his classes. You caught him a couple of times biting his lips to hold back tears when he was called on only to get a question wrong. You never stopped sending Eddie worried glances from across the room when his eyes seemed to shut and his head slowly fell on the desk. He was just miserable but his smile remained forced as if to keep others from worrying, but it only made people worry more. He would flinch violently whenever he was touched, even by a friend. His eyes looked lost and sunken in from countless nightmares and sleepless nights. His tiny frame grew frail due to him skipping meals. He just wasn’t ready.Įveryone was able to see he was struggling. He hated seeing you alone at the lunch table, but he just couldn’t bring himself to face you yet. So when he started avoiding you after he broke his arm, it hurt the both of you since it caused you to doubt yourself and Eddie to degrade himself. Maybe it was because you calmed his anxieties and always made him feel safe. The small boy would always hang out with you when he wasn’t with the Losers. Beverley would give him hugs whenever he would allow her to and Bill even offered to take him out to the movies, but He turned them all down before reassuring them that he was okay. Mike and Ben would offer their shoulders if he needed to cry or vent. Richie would ask for him to spend the night. Stan would ask if he wanted to come over for tea. He was different, and none of the Losers really knew how to help him. He didn’t speak a mile a minute, but instead hardly spoke at all. He wouldn’t argue with Richie when he said something stupid. Warnings: PTSD, Self Isolation, Self-Destructive behavior, Severe Anxiety, Insomnia, panic attacks.Īuthors note: In this, the Pennywise attacks happen when the losers are like 13-15.Įddie wasn’t one to hide his emotions, hell he usually wore them on his sleeve, but after the encounter with Pennywise? He seemed to change a lot.
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